Saturday, August 20, 2011

"She will speak HIS name!"

"Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ, is Lord to the glory of God the Father."  Philippians 2:9-11
"GOD is MIGHTY to SAVE"  love, Joan

She is a champion!  All of my children are.  They all have servants hearts.  I am weeping as I type today.  I am abundantly blessed.  Laurel, Coleman, Joan and Derrick each use the gifts God has given them.  I cannot express the joy that is in our home now.   Monday's doctors appointment was long, detailed and it was really intended for me to give more information than to receive information.  I loved everyone at the International Adoption Clinic.  There is one task they have given me that I keep saying, "I will start that tomorrow".  Today has to be the day.  Let's just say it's a nasty little task that I need to mark off my "to do list".  Ughh!  Anyway, when we go back in three weeks we will get information regarding how healthy Joan and Derrick are.  That was the longest appointment I have ever had in my life and to tell you the truth, I haven't really thought much about it since we went to the hearing clinic on Thursday.  Satan did everything he could to keep us from getting there.  We were given the wrong date and the wrong location twice but we made it there anyway.  After Monday's appointment, (8 viles of blood drawn on each of them), Joan and Derrick didn't want to get back in the car.  Joan wouldn't put on her seat belt and then after I "made" her, she took it off.  She battled with me all the way to downtown.  There computer crashed 3 times after I had given our information...I had to repeat the information 3 times...do you see what I'm saying?  Satan didn't want us to get the news that God was preparing to give us!  Joan CAN hear...not very much but enough that they believe that hearing aids will help!  This testing was not painful to her at all.  She was apprehensive at first because of the testing that had taken place on Monday and I couldn't blame her.  When we got into the sound proof booth, Joan was nervous.  It is hard for me to watch her struggle with trust because she is soooo trusting!  Once she realized it would be fun to "play" in the booth, she relaxed and so did I.  I could hear some of the sounds she did not hear.  I was sitting right behind her.  The sounds got louder and I couldn't see her face.  Then, the lady said, "put it in".  Joan lit up like a light and put the ball in the bucket.  I began to weep and thank the Lord because I knew she could hear.  She did it over and over and over.  She's so smart.  I was beginning to wonder if she had figured the game out and maybe she wasn't really "hearing".  They had a test to test her...technology.  We went to another room and they hooked some things up to her.  I put on her favorite show, "Tom and Jerry" and she waited patiently while the computer confirmed what God had already confirmed to me...our angel CAN hear.  The rest of the time becomes fuzzy because I again went on information overload.  All of that is details God will work out and show us what to do next.  They made all kinds of appointments for Joan.  She will see many specialists and I will drive her where and when they want her there.   They want Joan to have "heavy" speech therapy.  We haven't seen the ENT yet but we will very soon.  He will give us the final instructions and we will pray for him as God guides us down the journey of "hearing" the way HE has guided us down the journey of "deafness".  When I first found out that she was hearing and that they believed she will learn to speak, my heart immediately thought of Rays of Hope...the children that are still wondering why I took Joan and Derrick and not them.  I thought more about Joan speaking instead of Joan hearing.  God has given her a platform through her deafness that I do not completely comprehend yet.  He has equipped her to do whatever HE needs for her to do.  I'm in awe of Him through her!  Joel will be here soon.  I can't wait to see him!  I'm sure there may be times when my loved ones in Africa wonder if I have forgotten them.  There is no way I can every forget the precious children at Rays of Hope or Sozo.  I don't know what our next trip to Africa will look like...I've been praying about that as well.  I will go with no expectations.  I will go with my heart wide open and know that God is working in the suffering.  Suzanne told me that more than once...I would say, "I don't know how I will handle the suffering".  She would say, "Amiee, God is working through the suffering."  They were suffering before I got there.  They are suffering after I left.  They are suffering right now as I type about the joyful life I am blessed with.  So what can I do with that information?  I will surrender to God that HE is the Father of the Fatherless and I will commit my life to serving HIM, not the world.  Believe it or not it's not as easy for me to be as humble  in the 35242 zip code area.  Honestly, I was on my knees more in Uganda.   My time in Africa seems like a dream to me sometimes but I know when I begin to share about a child or an incident and my eyes well up with tears and my heart physically begins to ache that it wasn't a dream and there is still much more to do.  I can not save them.  I'm not supposed to.  I'm supposed to be the vessel to let them know they are loved by a God that I have seen move mountains and that HE is mighty to save...not me.  I've got to be sure the children at Rays of Hope and Sozo know that God loves them.  That's all I can do.  That's all I'm supposed to do.  They will know because JOAN will tell them by the grace of God.   God isn't finished with Reeves Party of Six yet.  Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

In His Grip,
Amiee

Sunday, August 14, 2011

"I believe in angels!"

"See, I am sending an angel ahead of you to guard you along the way and to bring you to the place I have prepared."  Exodus 23:20

"Are not all angels ministering spirits sent to serve those who will inherit salvation?"  Hebrews 1:14
Nina and "Petah"...Our angels in Amsterdam
Friends in Entebbe Airport
Joan looking at the airplane she has been dreaming about...

I believe in angels. When Laurel was 22 months old she fell 15 feet from the second floor window of our home.  She hit a holly bush and landed in a mound of pine bark.  About 3 weeks after the fall, Todd and I struggled with the guilt and the thought that we could have so easily lost her.  One day when she was sitting in her high chair I asked her, "Laurel, who caught you when you feel out of the window?"  I anticipated her answer to be "daddy caught me".  Todd was the first one to her.  He practically jumped out of the window after her.  She looked me directly in the face and without hesitation, she answered, "the angel caught me mommy".  I had never talked to her about angels.  She wasn't even two years old.  I asked her with tears in my eyes, "Laurel, what did the angel look like?"...she paused and smiled, "she looked like me."  That was the end of the conversation.  I needed no further proof.  The angel did catch her that day.  There was no other explanation.  It's really hard for me to sometimes  to write these blogs without rambling.  I hope that I am able to explain this to you without to much confusion.  The best way for me to start sometimes is to just dive in and go straight to the point.  Here we go.  Around the middle of May, I began to loose hope that we wouldn't get a court date before the summer break that the courts in Uganda take.  This is adoption...a roller coaster ride and for those of you who know me, I don't ride roller coasters.  They make me feel sick to my stomach.  I cannot ride them.  This time in May, God was growing me in a way that I never saw coming.  I had been praying and praying and praying for God to please give us a court date.  It did not come.  I began to know that the reason God wasn't answering my prayer the way I wanted HIM to was because my prayer wasn't inline with God's will.  After much thought, prayer and consideration, I changed my prayer.  It was difficult for me I have to admit.  I was so full of "self" at this time.  We were so close to being able to go to Uganda and hold Joan and Derrick.  God led me to pray that the children who needed the court dates the most be granted the dates.  I surrendered the prayer of the court date for Joan and Derrick.  The first time I prayed it, I cried.  My motherly instinct felt like I was giving up on Joan and Derrick.  God was showing me AGAIN, I'm not in control of this adoption and I never was.  The next day I prayed again for the children that needed to get home first be granted get the court dates.  When I started praying this prayer, I began to feel a peace.  I can't explain it.  I just know it was the Holy Spirit!  My anxiety left me.  My hope did not deminish.  My faith grew.  It was really hard for me at first.  The only way my faith could grow was by trusting God.  Not that I really had in choice in the matter but I could either surrender and live in peace or I could keep fooling myself, thinking that I am in control.  It was during this week, that I gave the date to God Todd said, "I think it's time we go."  He said, I think we should go without a court date and pray that we get one while we are there.  I was again on the roller coaster but this time, I loved riding it.  You know the rest of this part of the story.  We were there one week.  We went to visit the Nile River in Jinja and as we were walking down to the water where Moses floated down the river in a wicker basket, the phone rang.  It was the lawyer.  We had a court date.  So, fast forward to day 32.  I'm sitting in the Entebbe Airport in Uganda praying that the two African children that I have been dying to bring home don't act like I'm kidnapping them.  Laurel and I are sitting in the airport and a woman comes up to us.  She asks, "are you adopting"?  I said yes and told her a little of our story.  She was from America. Her name is Casey.  She said, "I had a court date but one of the witnesses that they needed never showed up so I am going to have to come back in one month.  I felt so bad for her.  Another lady comes and sits beside us.  She is from America.  Her name is Betsey.  She says, "are you adopting?"  I say yes and I tell her a little of our story.  She says, "something went wrong with my lawyer and the judge."  I will have to come back maybe in a year to get my son.  I felt sick for her.  The three of us sat there and all I could think about was remembering my prayer, "please let the children that need to come home before the courts break", and looking at Joan, staring out the window looking at the airplane that she has been dreaming of for 6 months, maybe longer.  I watched Derrick line all of his cars up, neatly and orderly, at almost midnight, waiting to fly on an airplane.  These ladies were God's angels that HE sent to me.  They both told me they were okay leaving their children behind.  There children were in safe places.  They said they weren't bitter or upset, maybe a little disappointed but they knew it was God's plan.  To witness the faith Casey and Betsey's have  was God moving a mountain for me.  Joan, Derrick, Laurel and I got on the plane almost last.  I passed both ladies. Both of them watched us walk past them.  They took my hand and said, "you've made it!"  They were happy for me instead of sad for themselves...they may have been sad but they were not without hope.  Many adopting parents will tell you that you don't really feel good about the progress of the adoption until you are "on the plane".   There are more things that can go wrong than right.  Again, I shed tears of joy and sadness as we prepared to leave Uganda.  God sent me angels in every airport.  Nina and Peter...Derrick still sees a ball and says "Petah".  We don't watch "Finding Nemo"..."it's finding "Nina".  My friend Casey who I met in Entebbe is going back very soon to bring her child home.  She sat in the Amsterdam Airport with us after the seven hour flight while we ate breakfast. I don't really remember how but Joan and Derrick befriended Peter and Nina.  Peter took Derrick to the center of the airport and played ball with him for at least 30 minutes, maybe longer.  Derrick  needed to run around and play and I was already exhausted from the first leg of the flight.  Nina read books with Joan.  It was a nice break for Laurel and I that God knew we needed before the next 8 hour flight.  Nina left for a brief time and came back with two yellow presents.  She handed the packages to Joan and Derrick and Derrick said, "pank you".  Joan and Derrick had never had a present before so they didn't know to open them...maybe they had had a gift before but I don't think they had ever had something that was wrapped.  They were excited to get the package but they were thrilled when they realized their was something inside of it.  I don't know if Peter and Nina have children but if they don't they should.  Nina was smart enough to know to buy them exactly the same thing.  It was the perfect gift for 2 orphans whose world was changing in front of our very eyes.  Nina, if you are reading this, please email me.  I have not found your email address.  Peter and Nina were our angels in Amsterdam.  The next leg of the flight was extremely difficult.  I don't really want to go into the details but emotionally for me I had a hard time not thinking about the children of Uganda.  Joan was difficult to deal with. That's another blog.  I realized as we got closer to Detroit that we would only have 3 hours instead of 4 hours because of the time change.  There must have been 500 people waiting in line for visas to be processed and I'm not exaggerating.  After you go through visas, you have to go through customs.  After you go through customs, you have to go through security again...then you get on a train and go to the next gate.  Oh yeah, we had to visit the CDC officer because Joan's medical report in March indicated she had had TB.  There was no way we would have made our plane without a special officer.  I have misplaced his card and I'm praying that I find it.  He got our boarding passes for the four of us while we waited in line for visa's.  He let Laurel go get our luggage before she was supposed to.  He took us through customs so we didn't even have to stop there.  He put us ahead of people in line at security...He gave me his card which I have misplaced and told me if we ever flew internationally again and if we needed his help to please contact him.  He was our angel in Detroit.  We flew to Atlanta and I have to say we were so glad to be in the South.  I'm sure there were angels in Atlanta but I confess I was to tired to see them.  We were done.  We were so close to home...Atlanta to Birmingham is about an hour and a half drive.  We were delayed in Atlanta 3 hours including the time we spent on the run way waiting to take off with our seats straight up and seat belts fastened.  Then, we arrived in Birmingham...angels that had prayed for "Reeves Party of Six" were waiting with open hearts and open arms.  There were some of our angels that weren't there physically but they were there in spirit.  God sent HIS angels ahead of us and prepared every step of our journey.  I believe in angels!  Thanks be to God.

In HIS Grip,
Amiee

Saturday, August 6, 2011

"Celebrating Joan's Birthday"

"He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way.  All the ways of the Lord are loving and faithful for those who keep the demands of his covenant."  Psalm 25: 9-10

"On Eagle Valley Lane"
"At Rays of Hope"


Today is Joan's birthday.  We are celebrating her 6th birthday.  Is she really 6?  Only her Father knows.  We have tried to make an educated guess but we really don't know.  Her birth certificate says she's 8.  Her shot records say she's 7.  Her "dental records" say she's 7.  Her momma says she's turning 6 today.  This is just one of the details in her life that I have had to let go and say "Ok Lord, she's really not mine, she's yours."  He keeps reminding me of this with her.  "How can I glorify you?"  That's all HE wants me to do with her, glorify HIM.  He will show me, in HIS time.  If you say "Happy Birthday" to Joan today, she will smile and say "Happy Birthday" back to you.  She has no idea what this means.  If you ask her "how old are you?"  She will have no idea.  She will smile back at you and probably find a way to love you back.  It's not because she's not smart because if you've had the opportunity to meet her, you know she's very bright.  She doesn't know because she's not had anyone to celebrate her "day" with her.  I do not believe the people that brought her into this world were bad people.  In fact, I know for sure that God loves them as much as He loves me.  That is what is so beautiful to me...God loves us the same.  He hates my sin of pride as much as there sins.  The burden that I am carring is that I know how HE loves me and I know I am forgiven and they don't.  That is what has broken me about my time in Uganda.  It's not what they don't have that saddens me.  It's that many, not all, don't know the love of Jesus.  It's that they don't have the hope of their salvation in Jesus Christ.  Where we were, I actually saw a lot of food.  I saw people with very little but they took care of what they had.  They didn't want "more".  They looked at "Mazunga" and they saw "hope".  Unfortunately, that is a false hope because as white as my skin is, I am powerless to help them.  I pray for them that someway, they put their hope in the LORD.  If they can come to know the Lord beyond my white skin, praise be to God!  How does this relate to Joan's birthday?  I don't know yet.  I will know by the end of this blog, God will show me.  Last night, I took her to the grocery store to get milk and eggs.  This is the second trip for milk and eggs this week.  These children can't get enough.  Anyway, I let her pick out some flowers and I told her they were for her.  She loves yellow and she picked out yellow daisy's.  She was so excited!  We got the things we went for and she was riding inside the buggy.  I have to say, I notice a lot of people glancing at us when we are in public.  I think there is a curiosity of our "transracial family".  I think if we had adopted two "white" children, outsiders wouldn't notice us.  I think God is using the color of our skin to glorify HIM...anyway, that's a different blog.  We got pineapple juice for Derrick (Joan reminded me to get this for him).  A man named Rich...I think that's what he said...came up to us and said to Joan, "Hello.  How are you?".   She smiled at him and shook his hand.  Then he said, "what's your name?"  She didn't answer because she didn't hear him.  He was drawn to her  for some reason.  She does that to people.  Many of you already have experienced Joan...she is an experience.  Anyway, I gave him the news, she is deaf.  He was immediately sad and even more intrigued with her.  I told her to tell him her name.  She signed to him "JOAN".  I translated...good enough for Joan but no other deaf person would have had a clue what I had said.  He said to me, "can you tell her my name is Rich and I love her."  I signed this to Joan and she signed back to him, "I love you".  I think Rich had tears in his eyes.  He didn't want to stop looking at her.  It was not a scary feeling.  It was God once again using Joan in a mighty way, with the color of her skin and with the deafness that I am praying HE will heal her from, to glorify HIS kingdom.  If I had adopted a white child, God could still use it to glorify HIM, but He gave me Joan so that he would not whisper, "He is mighty to save".  He gave me Joan so that HE can shout, "HE IS MIGHTY TO SAVE!!!!".  I have tears as I type this.  I have many emotions and I'm trying to share with you on Joan's "birthday" how blessed I am to celebrate this child's life.  This time next year I am praying that she is typing to you how God has worked in her life.  I'm praying that she will hear my voice say, "God loves you and so do I."   Until then, I will so my best to keep God at the focus of this journey with Joan and glorify HIS name.  Joan is humble and so I know that before we were in her life, HE has taught her HIS ways.  She is faithful!  She makes HIM smile.  HE is enlarging her territory and she will lead others to HIS kingdom.  She "gets it"...faith.  It's not because she speaks English, Luganda, ASL...whatever.  It's because HE has loved her, met her needs, and HE has been her Alpha and Omega.  He has carried her through the silence of her deafness and the darkness of the nights in Uganda.  He will do the same for me if I will ask HIM.  He will not fail me.  He hasn't failed her.  He has loved her with an unfailing love.  If you don't believe me, ask her.  She radiates the love of Christ.  If you don't see that, you are blind.  I'm not trying to be critical but that's the way God made her.  I am living with one of God's greatest creations.  HE wants me to share her, embrace her, learn from her and love her.  How much HE loves me!  Oh my goodness!  Thank you Father for humbling me though Joan.  Happy Birthday Joan!






All my love,

Mom :)

p.s. Please be praying if you would like to join us, "Reeves party of Six" on our next trip to Uganda...yes, I've been home 12 days and I'm ready to go back!  Oh my goodness, I can't believe I just said that ...:)  LOVE TO ALL!